May 11, 2003 at 12:52:00 AM CDT
 »  [listening to

pain - square pegs

have i mentioned how amazing suzanne is to me? no, not nearly enough.

lifted from the suice juice's journal:

"and i just dont wann give a shit anymore. and its goin to suck even more cuz neals in town and shit. its fukin annoyin when hes here, he fuks with my shit. wont leave me the fuk alone. messes up My bathroom. locks his door, where this comp is. and its like dude! we all know what your doin, cant you fukin grow up you fukin perv. and if he does read this. FUK YOU! u piss me off like a mother! all you care about is your ass, always wantin my ass to do shit for you. grow up! stop making me be ur slave. shit dude! just go live with martha or some shit.all you do is sleep here. did you forget you had a sister, the one you use to spend alot of time with, we could talk forever. and now its like i cant even get a "hey, sup" nothing, NOT A GOD DAMN THING. its like im the only child with this guy renting out the bedroom across from mine. wtf dude! "

suz, i'm sorry things are like that now. but you are funny when you get pissed. not to trivialize your emotions here. it's just funny thinking of you yelling at nael's door.

May 11, 2003 at 12:28:21 AM CDT
 »  [listening to

white stripes - seven nation army

you know, sometimes you think things are fine. and nothing can hurt you anymore, because you've had to deal with it for so long, that nothing, no anything can make you feel the same way you have for the majority of you existance? yeah, well, then reality makes a guest appearance. in an IM box, like the fucking deus ex machina reminding you that people are full of shit and no matter how much you think you can believe a person and look at them in their face and see their innards, they are nothing but falsity. but then you realize that person who is most false is none other than the man who thinks he is invincible to his own hate. this man wants you to believe he has it all put together. that he's well-adjusted, regardless. but he's willing to share his insides because that's the only way he remembers he's alive. red badges of courage to keep from ripping his own flesh from his brittle bones. so life sucks like that. sometimes.